The best negotiation tools will not make women better negotiators if they lack the ability to ask for what they want. In order for true and sustainable change to happen for women, the focus needs to begin at the source of the problem—their belief system of who they are, who they “ought” to be and who they can become.

About the Program

It is a known fact, traditional models of negotiation do not work for women--they go against everything a woman was taught to be like while growing up. As a society, most women learned at a young age that it is not appropriate or "feminine" to focus on what they want, assert their own ambitions, and pursue their selfinterest—and many people don't like it when they do.

From the time they are very young, girls are taught to focus on the needs of others rather than on their own. Young girls subconsciously internalize these messages into adulthood and as women find themselves with an internal struggle to ask for what they want. They are unaware that their reluctance to ask for what they want is a learned behavior, and one that can be unlearned. In order for women to negotiate effectively, they must:

  • Be comfortable with their Power
  • Eliminate the Limiting Disempowering Beliefs that make them anxious to Negotiate
  • Develop new Empowering Beliefs that make it easy to ask for what they want.

2017 Schedule - register

Course 1: Negotiating with Power & Grace | September 16 & 17, 2017

Course 2: Negotiating with Difficult People | October 15 & 15, 2017

Course 3: Negotiating for Leadership Success | November 4 & 5, 2017

2018 Schedule - register

Course 1: Negotiating with Power & Grace | January 20 & 21, 2018

Course 2: Negotiating with Difficult People | February 24 & 25, 2018

Course 3: Negotiating for Leadership Success | March 24 & 25, 2018

Course Descriptions

Course 1: Negotiating with Power & Grace

Understanding The 4 Stages of Negotiation

There are four stages that should be followed in order to negotiate successfully. Participants will learn how to Open a negotiation; Protect their interest as they move to agreement; Move to agreement through cooperative negotiation; Closing Strategies and Achieving agreements that assure commitment and performance. This course will walk them through each stage and provide specific tools to implement the strategies. Some of the main points are:

  • Strategies for effectively opening the negotiation talks
  • Compromise and concession patterns
  • Learning to read body language
  • Closing strategies
  • Effectively breaking a deadlock

Finding Your Negotiation Style

There are five main negotiating styles. Each woman must decide which one feels most comfortable to her in each negotiating situation. These styles are:

  • Competitive style: This involves an “I win, you lose” attitude.
  • Accommodating style: This uses an attitude that reflects, “I’ll let you win in exchange for some other benefit I hope to gain now or later.” or “I will let you win because I don’t want to deal with potential conflict.”
  • Compromising style: This reflects an attitude that says, “I don’t care who wins, I just want to get this over with quickly.”
  • Collaboration style: This shows a desire to stay on good terms with the person you’re negotiating with, a “Let’s be friends” attitude.
  • Avoidance style: indicates that you may not be ready or feel, “I don’t really want to negotiate

Fail-Proof Persuasion Strategies

There are different tactics that women can use to add more persuasion or emotional appeal to negotiating a win-win. This course provides participants with strategies for positively influencing the negotiation to set -up a win-win deal. Some are:

  • Hero strategy: Ask the person for advice (men love to feel like heroes) and win them over by making them feel important.
  • Rational persuasion: Uses logical and factual information to persuade others that a specific action will lead to a particular outcome desired by both sides.
  • Inspirational appeal: Motivates others to take action by appealing to their values, ideal and aspirations.
  • Morality appeal: Appeals to the conscience and desire to do the right thing

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Course 2: Negotiating with Difficult People

Power Moves for Handling Difficult People

Negotiators run the risk of encountering people, who for any number of reasons are difficult negotiators. Their behavior may be intentional—the result of a clear strategic, behavioral, or philosophical choice by the other party. Or the other party may not see any value or potential for a collaborative approach or doesn’t know how to craft and pursue such an approach. This course shows students the Power Moves designed to bring negotiators back to the table, including:

  • Incentives to draw the attention to the importance of the negotiation.
  • Pressure tactics to lead the other party to realize that the status quo is unacceptable.
  • Enlistment of allies to help the other party see the advantage of negotiating.

Negotiation Tactics and Counter Tactics

Offensive maneuvers are part of nearly every negotiation. Women who negotiate tend not to be aware of tactics that are used on them. And for every tactic there’s a counter-tactic, or defense. To be a great negotiator, it’s important to be familiar with a wide range of tactics, and also know how to defend against them with an appropriate counter-tactic. Participants will learn the 25 most used tactics such as:

  • Deferring to higher authority—the other party claims they can only negotiate on certain items, while other terms are non-negotiable and fixed by a higher authority.
  • Name dropping—your counterpart may mention having done business with a VIP or an esteemed company, or famous personalities.
  • Plus many more…

Passive Aggressive Moves to Watch Out For

There are passive aggressive negotiation moves that sooner or later will be used against you to lower your expectations and diminish your negotiating power. Participants will learn how to identify these moves and counter them before they have a negative impact. Some of these moves are:

  • Challenging competence or expertise: They call your experience and expertise into question.
  • Demeaning ideas: They attack your ideas directly in ways that give you little room to respond.
  • Criticizing style: They overreact or take inconsiderate positions by using phrases such as “Don’t get so upset,” “You are so greedy,”

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Course 3: Negotiating for Leadership Success

How, When and Why to Make Concessions

Making concessions advantageously during negotiation is a real art. But it is also a science, and there are rules that will “up your game”. In this course, participants will look at the art of conceding from four vantage points:

  • The concessions we make to ourselves
  • The concessions we make to others
  • The concessions we should not make at all
  • The concessions we accept

Many women believe that they will please others and ultimately be offered what they want, by making concessions. You will learn that Pleasing by conceding is not the way to get what you want in a business negotiation. It sets you up to be manipulated into doing it again and again. Concessions need to be given only with clearly negotiated rewards; even if you think it’s obvious, the other side probably doesn’t understand what’s important to you, so tell them.

Negotiating for Leadership Success

In this course you will learn how to: Negotiate compensation; Negotiate title and salary level that will garner peer respect and status; Demonstrate how perks like location, stock options, and flexible hours will benefit the company; Make it a condition that you meet and speak with all key players before you sign an employment contract; Negotiate needed resources up front, not after the offer is accepted; Negotiate a future career path and a (hopefully unnecessary) parting package. Learn how to avoid these common traps:

  • The frugality trap: Trying to gain points by doing more with fewer staff and resources or lower budget. Bringing in new resources (if needed, of course) creates respect and earns the loyalty of your new staff
  • The “we can discuss it later” trap and many more...

Backwards Mapping to Reach Your Objective

Though often overlooked, sequencing matters greatly in negotiation. Whether you negotiate for something large or small, you’ll face sequencing choices, such as how to determine whom to speak to first and then next. This course will teach participants that sometimes the rules of thumb such as “allies first” or “negotiateinternally, then externally” are unreliable guides and will detail a more effective approach of mapping a negotiation backwards. It’s important to envision your preferred outcome and think in reverse about how to get there using some basic steps, such as, creating a list of all parties currently involved and those who might potentially get onboard, along with their interests and their no-deal options.

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